Friday, October 1, 2010 (Day 251)

I'm finally back on track. I've been back on track for almost 3 weeks now. I've almost lost the weight that I gained on my "break". I'm at 165. I think I'd be lower, but I've been hitting the weights pretty hard this week and I feel like my muscles are growing. I've found my motivation again. There have been TONS of temptations the last 2 weeks, but I haven't actually been tempted by any of them. Weird, huh? I got my little black dress out of the bag from the top of my closet. It's been there since March 2006. I am determined to wear it at this year's office Christmas party on December 10th. I think I was about 135 pounds when I wore it in 2006. I figured it out, and in order to be 135 by the party, I need to lose 3 pounds per week. Absolutely reachable, even if they do say not to lose more than 2 pounds per week. I don't know if I'll be able to do it with my last 30 pounds, but we'll see. Then I'll be at my goal. Finally! How amazing would it be to wear that dress again?!?! How amazing would it be to reach my goal by the end of the year?!?! I am determined and I can do it!!!

Monday, August 30, 2010 (Day 219)

So, I’ve been gone a while.  I could give a lot of excuses.  It started when my brother and his family came into town and we ate out a few times in a week.  Also because they were in town, I didn’t get to sleep on time and hence couldn’t wake up and exercise.  Add a holiday to the mix.  Then the next week was my birthday.  Then I just couldn’t get back on track.  So basically I ate anything and everything in sight for 4 weeks and didn’t exercise.  I gained 23 pounds. 

I had a doctor appointment on week 3.  She confirmed my suspicion that I am no longer in the diabetic or pre-diabetic range.  My blood sugar for the last three months is completely and totally normal.  YAY! Go me!  However, apparently she tested my thyroid.  Not good news.  Turns out I have hypothyroidism.  After learning this, and reading about the symptoms online, it explains A LOT about some things I’ve been going through.

First and foremost, why I am always fatigued and tired.  Second, why my hair is coming out.  Third, why Ray keeps asking why I’m so grumpy.  Four, why it’s hard to lose weight.  She prescribed me Levothyroxine.  It says to give it about 4 weeks to see the effects.  I think it’s doing a little something, as I’m not QUITE as fatigued.  My hair is still falling out, which is pretty distressing.

But, since last Monday, I’ve been doing my exercising and eating right again.  I feel so much better.  I don’t know why I let myself do so bad.  I’m down 10 of the 23 pounds I put on.  It’s a bummer that all my hard work goes down the drain so fast.  The most awesome thing though, is that Ray is dieting with me now.  He also went to the doctor the day I did.  He is officially diabetic and has sleep apnea.  FINALLY, he’s determined to lose weight.  It’s been fun trying new healthy recipes and ingredients.  It’s so much easier for me to do this when I’m not cooking myself different food for dinner than the rest of the family.  And I unfroze our gym memberships today too.  This is the beginning of a beautiful friendship!

Willpower

Boston Cream Pie.  Red Velvet Cake.  Apple Pie.  7 Layer Dip with Chips.  Pineapple Upside Down Cake.  Chocolate Cake.  What do all of these things have in common?  They’re all in the office refrigerator waiting for the 3:00 monthly birthday party to begin.  That’s right folks.  I’m subjected to this kind of crap every single month.  Not to mention all the other things I’m subjected to weekly.  Tortilla chips and dip (any kind) are my major weakness.  But that red velvet cake and the pineapple cake look insanely delicious!  And when I opened the fridge to get out my Slim Fast, I could smell the Boston cream pie, and it was amazing.  I want to give in.  But I really don’t.  Nothing tastes as good as thin feels, right?  In fact, just today a female attorney expressed her awe at my weight loss and how good I look.  That is definitely a motivation builder.  Up to this point, they have always had a veggie tray at the monthly party.  Today, no veggie tray in sight.  So I’m not even going to go into the party.  And I’m going to fill up my water in the kitchen now so I won’t have to go in there for anything after the party (the kitchen is where they put all the leftovers).  I can do this!  I really, really can!  I’m holding out to splurge again until my birthday.  And today is NOT my birthday!

Monday, July 19, 2010 (Day 177)

I’m feeling good.  I’m down to 165.  However, we went to a family reunion Saturday.  I was planning to eat well, but they had some of my favorite things there.  I had to eat the spaghetti noodle pasta salad.  I didn’t feel bad about it.  But they also had dutch oven beef and potatoes.  Had to have some of that!  Then Chris didn’t finish all his food, and I couldn’t let the funeral potatoes go to waste, so I ate them.  And is left over ham.  And seconds of the yummy green salad with almonds and cranberries.  And the apples and peaches in pudding.  All so good!  Still didn’t feel bad about it.  I hadn’t eaten breakfast and I was just gonna have Slim-Fast for dinner.  So really I wouldn’t have been too far out of my calorie range.  But then I went to a wedding reception.  Completely planning to not eat anything.  But when I saw the cookies!!!! I about died.  My favorite thing in the whole wide world is Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups.  And peanut butter cookies.  They had peanut butter cookies with peanut butter cups stuck in the middle!  Had to have 2 of those.  Plus yummy sugar cookies, had to have one.  Then I had to go back for seconds and get a peanut butter cookie with Hershey’s kiss in the middle.  And a chocolate cookie with powdered sugar all over it.  Then, Angela didn’t finish her cookies. So I did.  YUM!!!  Then I went home and was lonely ‘cause everyone was asleep and I wasn’t tired.  So I sat and ate from the 2 gallon container of cheese balls Ray bought a few weeks ago.  I went to bed thinking I’d just throw in the towel on the whole weekend and eat pancakes for breakfast Sunday, and hot dogs for lunch, and chips and salsa (I would have eaten them Saturday night except my stomach was gonna explode).  I woke up Sunday with a different attitude and stuck with my diet.  Felt great to do good.  Weighed in this morning at 165, so Saturday didn’t completely kill my diet.  I’m glad about that.  If I’d have eaten yucky yesterday, I would have gone to lunch with my friend Lani today and eaten bad.  Then Wednesday is the monthly firm birthday party – I would have eaten badly then.  All in all, I’m SO happy to report Saturday didn’t turn into a week of binging!  I’ve already reached my second or third goal for my 31^st birthday.  So now I think I’ll move my weight goal to 160 by my birthday (2.5 weeks).  And if I hit 160 before then, I’ll move it again.  J  I feel really good about how things are going.  I just wish I was there already.  And by “there” I mean, weighing 135.

Friday, July 16, 2010 (Day 174) - I'M NOT OBESE!!!

After forever, I’m FINALLY not obese!  This is going off the Body Mass Index chart.  I officially hit 166 pounds, which puts me in the “overweight” category now.  I need to be 140 to get in the “normal” range.  I’m glad the overweight range is small.  I can hit 140 soon – I hope!  I’m so excited to hit this milestone!  Go me!

Tag

I took the kids to the park last night.  While we were there, Cayden wanted to play tag.  As I was running around chasing them and running away from them, I thought about the fact that I would never have been able to do that just a few months ago.  I was climbing up the park equipment, sliding down the slides, etc.  It was great to be able to give them a fun and energetic mom!  Even though they still run faster than me. J  It was a good break from the typical exercising.  I’m a bit perturbed that the scale isn’t moving.  It’s saying 167.  I don’t know how I feel about it.  I’ve still managed to stay on track since Sunday, even though I usually go off track when the scale is being mean.  We’ll see what it looks like in a few days, this coming Sunday.  Whatever it says, I’m thrilled with the way I look and the energy I have!

Monday, July 12, 2010 (Day 170)

The scale read 169 yesterday morning.  That’s crap.  I didn’t gain a pound last week.  I should be at 165.  I haven’t had a bowel movement in about 4 days, so that’s probably why.  But, I guess it still bothered me subconsciously because I ate everything except the kitchen sink last night.  Homemade ice cream (2 cups), cheese balls, fruit snacks, popcorn … That’s it?  Wow, it sure seemed like I ate more than that!  I was able to lay off the chips and salsa (because, even though my brain wanted it, I knew my stomach would explode if I ate any more).  Oh, and I ate one of each flavor of tootsie roll.  I was telling myself that my body thought I was starving and I needed to show it otherwise.  Maybe true, maybe not.  Who knows!  All I know is that I’ve eaten under 1200 calories every day last week and I’ve worked out longer than I ever have every day last week.  So for the scale to be up a pound pissed me off, big time!  It better fix itself before I fall off the wagon!

 

Wednesday, July 7, 2010 (Day 165)

So, despite being in a really good mood yesterday morning and despite how motivated I was yesterday morning, I had a rough evening.  Ray made bbq chicken.  I made corn on the cob and mac & cheese.  I was actually REALLY good.  I had a piece of chicken and two corns on the cob.  I didn’t even take one tiny bite of the mac (it has 270 calories in one cup!).  I was feeling good about myself.  But , I wasn’t satisfied at ALL.  Even though my stomach was full.  I was SO tempted to eat all the mac in the pan, but I DIDN’T.  But I did get a bag of my diet popcorn out and make it.  Ate the whole thing – 240 calories.  Still feeling fine about my day because I was still within my calorie limit.  Then I had a diet popsicle – 10 calories.  Still feeling good about myself because I was still within my calories.  But STILL not satisfied.  I went to get in bed and Cayden’s salt and vinegar Pringles were sitting there right by my alarm clock.  I broke, after all the willpower I had with the other stuff (did I mention Ray was eating caramel popcorn and it smelled SO good!  BUT, I only ate 4 of the Pringles – about 40 calories.  So, really I did AWESOME yesterday considering how bad I wanted to eat everything, and a lot of it.

I didn’t realize what the problem was last night, but this afternoon when my period started, last night made sense.  I’m SO happy that I didn’t cave!  I feel really good about myself for getting through the night.  I could have easily eaten ALL of Cayden’s chips.  Oh, did I mention Ray brought home a HUGE barrel of cheese balls (like cheetos, but round)?  I’ve been able to avoid them – which was nearly impossible last night.

And I did my hour on the treadmill this morning too.  Go me!

Tuesday, July 6, 2010 (Day 164)

Feeling awesome today!  Finally!  I’m down to 168.  I was able to eat super well all 4^th of July weekend.  And exercise!  In fact, I did 90 minutes each day instead of 60.  I was going to wear a shirt this morning, but it was totally falling off me.  It looked like I was a little kid trying to wear my dad’s clothes or something.  While that was a pain to take off and find something else, I was thrilled with it. Time to throw it in the D.I. bag.  I’ve found it REALLY hard to get 10,000 steps on the pedometer!  It’s okay if I walk on the treadmill for an hour (because that gives me nearly 8,000 already).  But if I do Gilad, or mow the grass, or anything else for exercise, it doesn’t do well.  And, besides my hour of exercise, I realize I don’t walk hardly at all!  I would have guessed I walk a lot, with all the housework and stuff.  Not so!  It’s been an eye opener, for sure.  I hope I don’t get obsessed with the whole how-many-steps-have-I-taken thing.  I brought my walking shoes to work so I can go out at lunch.  That will be in addition to my morning treadmill or other exercise.  Did I mention I feel awesome!  I’m 8 pounds away from my goal of 160 by my birthday.  Then I’ll be 25 pounds away from the ULTIMATE goal of 135!  Insane!!! 

P.S. – I also tried a couple diet frozen meals and I LOVE them.  Terriyaki chicken (Smart Ones, I think) and Jumbo [some kind of pasta] with Meatballs (Lean Cuisine, I think).  They are great!!!  I pair them with some peas or corn.  I also had a Smart Ones Mexican dish, and it was great paired with some extra black beans.  Yummo!

 

Pedometer Information

I bought the pedometers for work last night.  I did the treadmill for an hour and 15 minutes.  One full hour on the treadmill was about 8,000 steps.  The treadmill showed 4.5 miles and the pedometer showed 4.08 miles.  Close enough.  Neither are calibrated to the length of my stride anyway.  I did exercise this morning, but I did Gilad, so I didn’t wear the pedometer.  From the time I got completely dressed and put on the pedometer (all I’ve done after that is walk around the house grabbing my purse, walking from the car to train, from train to work, etc.), I’ve gone 1147 steps.  That’s cool!  I’m impressed that it doesn’t count the bumps while in the car or on the train.  It really does just count steps.  And I’m confident it’s getting all my steps.  I’m excited for this.  I know they “want” you to get 10,000 steps per day.  And one of the girls here at work said her friend is doing this at their work and the highest is 18,000 steps per day.  It’ll be fun to see how many we can take!  I’m glad I’ve finally got something that’s excited me about the whole exercise thing and diet too.  Wahoo!

 

Pedometer Challenge

A small group of us girls at work are starting a challenge.  We’re buying pedometers (all the same) and beginning next week we’re going to wear them and have a challenge as to who can take the most steps.  It should be a cool and fun way to keep us all motivated.  There’s only one girl in the group bigger than I am, the rest are all at a good weight, but want to lose like 5 pounds and be in better shape.  That’s cool though.  The other girl (I don’t know why I say “girl” when we’re all 30-40 years old) used to weigh about 300 pounds.  She lost about 170 over a couple years.  She got married though, and now she’s gaining it back.  I think she’s on hormones and stuff to get pregnant, and I know that will put weight on you also.  Don’t know why I even brought that up.  I’m buying the pedometers tonight and maybe I’ll tell everyone to start Saturday morning so our 4^th of July activities can count.

 

Wednesday, June 30, 2010 (Day 158)

I’ve had a rough time lately.  This seems to be a common theme.  I took last week off my diet.  Same old, same old, ate everything in sight.  I weighed in Sunday at 182 (gained 10 pounds last week).  I felt worse than when I went on vacation and did the same thing because I wasn’t planning on last week being a free week.  But we had Fathers Day Sunday, then BBQ with Lance, Lacie, Lonny and Amy Wednesday, then rodeo Thursday, parade Friday.  I could have done okay with those things – but I didn’t.  It’s Wednesday and I’m back down to 174.  So I’m only up 2 pounds from 10 days ago.  But still, I could have been below 170 by now.  And I’m worried because this coming weekend is the 4^th of July.  Then later this month is the 24^th of July.  I don’t know what’s going to happen.  There is just over 5 weeks until my 31^st birthday.  I’d love to lose as much as I can before then.  Just because.  I’ve way outreached my goal for my birthday, but that was set 5 months ago.  Losing a healthy 2 pounds per week, I should be down to 160 by my birthday.  That would be cool.  That’s gonna be my new goal.  And that will hopefully motivate me to eat right and exercise during these July holidays.  I didn’t exercise all last week because we were playing every night and I just couldn’t wake up in the mornings.  I did exercise Monday and Tuesday, but I didn’t wake up this morning.  I’m feeling bad about it, but there’s always tonight.  I hope I have the motivation when I get home from work.  160, I can do it!  Then I’ll only be 25 pounds away from my ultimate goal!  That’s insane!

Tuesday, June 22, 2010 (Day 150 - 5 MONTHS)

It’s been 5 months since I started this whole thing.  I can’t believe it!  It doesn’t seem like it’s been that long!  And, in a way, it seems like it’s been longer.  I’m having a rough time this week.  It started on Sunday, which was Father’s Day.  I expected to eat well.  But I didn’t.  I wasn’t hard on myself because the only “bad” thing I ate was mac and cheese.  And I only had one serving.  But then we got home.  The kids had donuts.  They looked REALLY good.  So I ate one.  And a left-over half of Cayden’s.  I drank a Pepsi.  Not too bad, but I wasn’t happy about it.  I was filling in for SOMETHING, because I just wasn’t satisfied.  Then I realized what sounded good was tortillas with cheese and salsa.  So I made me a couple (on the huge tortillas).  Went to bed feeling bad about myself.  Woke up Monday, not in time to exercise.  Stuck to the plan during the day, but went crazy at dinner.  Ate another of the donuts.  Ate 4 of the mini cupcakes the kids also had (wish Ray would stop buying the kids all this crap!).  Ate a couple fried chicken tenders the kids didn’t eat, dipped in honey mustard sauce.  Along with my rotisserie chicken, also dipped in honey mustard sauce.  Wanted Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups, but Ray was at the store with me and wouldn’t let me.  I hid to eat the fried chicken and the donut and cupcakes.  Today is Tenant Appreciation Day in our building.  They give out free crap.  This time it’s ice cream.  I’m glad I’m not too into ice cream.  I think I’m lacking self control because I know I have a dinner party tomorrow.  If I’m going to have a party Sunday and Wednesday, why bother being good in between?  But I’m trying to be on track today.  Didn’t exercise again this morning.  I’ll be cleaning the house tonight.  Hopefully I’ll be able to get up and exercise Wednesday morning.  But I completely plan to eat unhealthy at my dinner party.  Onion rings.  BBQ beef and pork.  Baked beans with bacon.  Butter on my corn on the cob.  And I’m also going to eat the Éclair dessert that I didn’t eat last time I made it.  I feel like I’ve gained 20 pounds in the last 2 days.  I’m going to try not to weigh again until next Sunday.  Then I’ll see what the true damage is for the week.

 

Thursday, June 17, 2010 (Day 145)

I feel good today.  I feel great as far as the way I look.  But, as I mentioned, I’ve been sick.  It never got really bad, just a nagging yucky feeling.   I have coughing fits.  They seem to strike the hardest when I exercise and when I lay down.  And when I’m on the bus/train.  So, basically at the worst times.  I didn’t sleep well last night because of the coughing, so I wasn’t able to wake up this morning to exercise.  I wanted to do The Biggest Loser.  I might take the kids to the park tonight and walk/jog there.  Or maybe I’ll do The Biggest Loser.  I just don’t feel like doing any exercise, but I can’t bring myself to take a day off.  I’m stuck at 173, but I feel constipated.  I don’t know why because I’ve been taking in plenty of fiber and plenty, plenty of water.  So who knows.  Maybe still the sodium from Saturday, and I also had Costa Vida Tuesday.  Even though I ate healthy at Costa Vida, it still could have been loaded with sodium (black beans and chicken – don’t know how they seasoned the chicken).  So I’m not worried.  I had Subway last night and it really hit the spot.  It’s been a while.  I’ve also been way under my calories this week, so I think it was good to hit 1200 yesterday (with healthy food, not junk).  I’m wearing a new skirt (size 16) and a new blouse today – I think that’s what’s keeping me happy.  I’m really glad I posted the before and semi-after pictures side by side too.  That REALLY boosted me! 

 

Before and (Semi) After

Since trying on clothes Saturday, I've been a little bummed at how not-smaller I am. I went back and looked at my before pictures. I'm proud! Sure, I have more to go. But, who cares! I'm doing it baby! I know my pictures are posted here on the side, but they aren't side to side comparisons. So, here they are side to side - it's more dramatic! :)

Monday, June 14, 2010 (Day 142)

I’m not sure how I feel today.  I’m wearing skinny clothes, so I feel good.  But, I went clothes shopping on Saturday and everything I took into the dressing room was way too small.  So I’m not nearly as small as I think I am.  That was a bummer.  I allowed myself to eat what I wanted on Saturday too.  It was Connor’s birthday party.  I actually didn’t eat anything all day and the party was at 3:00.  They had healthy options that I was happy about.  But, I didn’t only stick to the fruits and veggies (that were both really good)!  I enjoyed a bratwurst and pasta salad.  And seconds of the pasta salad.  It was GOOD!  And potato chips and onion dip (which I brought to the party solely to get it out of my house so I wouldn’t eat it).  Lol.  That wasn’t bad.  I didn’t feel bad at all about eating those things.  But then I went home and ate a whole pack of graham crackers, some with chocolate frosting (it would have all been with frosting if we had vanilla).  Then I had a full bag of non-diet popcorn (extra butter).  And the kids shared their Sour Patch Kids with me (my favorite!).  I did bad because I started bad on Friday night.  Instead of just eating the stew that I planned to eat with the family (I decided not to because it had WAY too much sodium, and I needed to get rid of my grilled chicken), I had a salad with chicken on top.  That didn’t satisfy me at all.  So I ate a pack of graham crackers trying to find satisfaction.  Then a bag of popcorn (diet kind).  Oh, I also had a couple sodas on Saturday.  The scale is showing 175 today.  I assume that some of that is water weight from the sodium (popcorn, bratwurst, potato chips).  I did my Walk at Home video on Sunday.  Actually, I did it twice.  So I did 2 hours of good exercise yesterday.  I ate healthy.  I am sick.  I have a cold.  I couldn’t exercise this morning.  But I do plan to when I get home.  I went to bed at 8:30 last night so I’d get plenty of sleep and wake up and exercise.  But I woke up at 1:45 in the morning and couldn’t fall back asleep for the life of me.  It was after 3:30 before I finally fell back to sleep.  5:00 came and I couldn’t get up.  So I don’t know. 

Thursday, June 10, 2010 (Day 138)

I feel great today!  I got on the scale and I’m at 172.  I did 1.5 hours of Gilad yesterday morning.  I went to bed too late last night and couldn’t get up this morning.  So I’ll be doing the treadmill tonight.  I feel great about this week because, not only did I finally hit (and smash) 175, but we had a baby shower for a girl at work.  All sorts of yummy food – including my éclair dessert – and I stuck to my guns, ate the salad with light dressing, and fruit.  I’m so proud of myself!  172!  I’m in size 16 clothes now, too.  That means, no more X’s!!!   I’m in medium/large shirts, and 16 bottoms.  I’m thrilled!

Tuesday, June 8, 2010 (Day 136)

FINALLY!  I FINALLY got to, and under, 175!  That means I get to take my 50 pounds lost pictures tonight.  I’m really excited!   I’ve been waiting for this number for 4 weeks now!  It feels like a giant hurdle that I finally made it over.  That means I’ve lost 51 pounds.  39 more to go.  40 sounded like a lot, but 39 doesn’t seem bad at all.  While walking outside this morning I was thinking that it’s 20 pounds, twice.  That’s easy!  20 pounds is nothing!  Once I lose 19 pounds, I’ll only have a total of 20 more to go!  That’s insane!  I never thought I’d be this close.  Well, I mean, I thought I would, but I didn’t imagine it.  You know?  I’ve always known (and still do) that I’ll reach my goal of being 135.  It’s just that I never could picture actually being at that point, or being at this point.  I’m thrilled and I can’t wait to hit 170 next.

 

Monday, June 7, 2010 (Day 135)

My body is just refusing to hit 175.  I can’t figure it out!  It was refusing before vacation.  Now, since vacation, I dropped weight quickly and suddenly it stopped at 176 again.  I shouldn’t be too upset since it’s only been stuck 2 days, and not a week, like before vacation.  But this is bothering me!  What the crap!  I did good all weekend, exercised great and ate great.  I’ll do things right this week and see what happens.  I’m bummed because I wanted to eat treats this weekend.  And I didn’t.  Now I feel like I might as well have.  But I should know better.  At least I didn’t gain – which is what would happen if I eat treats.  I should be proud of myself and my body for exercising and feeling good.  But I want numbers dang it!  Maybe tomorrow morning. 

Friday, June 4, 2010 (Day 132)

Well, I’m back down to 178.  That’s the last weight I was at my official weigh-ins before vacation.  I got down to 176, but not on my Sunday weigh-in.  So I’m going to consider myself caught up.  I’m pleased that the weight is just dropping off this week.  I knew taking a week break would be good to get over my plateau.  I think 175 is actually well within reach now that my body is confused.  Did the treadmill Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday.  This morning I did The Biggest Loser workout.  I’m glad I can still do it.  I thought I would have lost strength for not exercising for 10 days, but I seem to be okay.  I’ve been able to rock the treadmill at 3.8 mph.  I felt like I could have run, but I don’t want to.  I don’t want to injure my joints.  It’s just as good of a workout walking, I’m trying to convince myself I don’t need to run.  So I’m happy with this week’s workouts!  And my willpower this week!  We still have leftover desserts, chips, potato salad, everything from the weekend that I would LOVE to eat.  Oh, including my 2 king size Reese’s peanut butter cup packs (8 large cups).  I’m doing good though and not eating them.  Not even tempted because the scale is being so good to me!